Scary. Just...scary.

Last Wednesday we got the go-ahead from Paul's work to take a day off in the middle of several assigned days off so we could make a quick trip to Utah. YAY! More on the good parts of the trip to come.

Monday morning I was yanked out of a sound sleep by the sound of Paul yelling "Mary! Mary, what's wrong with him?! Mary!!" I bolted out of bed just as he ran into our room, holding Sam and looking desperate. Sam's eyes were rolling crazily around in his head and he was having a huge spasm followed by a half sob before the next spasm cut it off. He was totally unresponsive, and I knew immediately that he was having a seizure. I was SO terrified. I shouted at Paul to give him a blessing, which he did. He blessed Sam that he would come out of his seizure and be healthy and happy. I said "amen" and watched Sam with half-relief for a few seconds, thinking "ok, awesome, this is where he's going to stop seizing now!" ...but he didn't. Something then told me to strip his inexplicably hot little body down out of his footie pajamas. I did so, grabbed him, and ran upstairs, shouting for my parents. Because, you know, old habits die hard and I wanted them to make it better.

Lucky for me, Paul is fantastically level-headed in a crisis, and he dialed 911 while we ran upstairs. It was awful. The only thing I could see was our son's little body, twitching unnaturally every few seconds. I couldn't even hear anything else around me - including, for the most part, Paul's discussion with emergency dispatch. He was the one who checked for unobstructed breathing, responsiveness, etc., because I just...couldn't. When dispatch finally said the medics were on their way, my mom had the presence of mind to snap me out of it and tell me to go get some clothes so I could go to the hospital. I grabbed the first ones I saw - my outfit from the night before, a low v-neck shirt that definitely needs a tank top underneath. But no tank top in my rush - pretty embarrassing later on when I realized I'd been flashing my stuff to the EMT's and hospital staff all morning. Classy.

We were so blessed, and the paramedics responded insanely fast. Sam had been seizing for about five minutes total when they got there. And we had the most amazing EMT there who, from the very beginning, began telling us exactly what was going on and why, and encouraging and soothing us, telling us that he looked great, that we had done everything exactly right, etc. That made a world of difference to me - just brought me back to a calmer, clearer state of mind. He said that it looked like a febrile - fever-induced - fever, and that Sam was probably going to be just fine but we were still for sure going to go to the hospital and get everything cleared. The crazy thing is, Sam's temperature was only 101.9 degrees when they took it! My little boy is so smart - the EMT said "ok, I'm going to have to give him some medicine to bring him out of the seizure, and I'm going to have to give it to him rectally." He drew up the syringe, twisted off the needle and was just reaching for his diaper when Sam started crying - meaning that he'd pulled out of the seizure (which lasted about 7 minutes total). Smart boy! I was so intensely relieved, I can't even begin to explain it.

After a few more minutes of clearing Sam for travel, we headed to the ambulance. I rode with him and Paul drove behind us, because as we established earlier, he is the one that had the clear head. I probably would have crashed into the back of the ambulance or something in my frenzy. Again, the EMT was so, so great. They started an IV line and filled some blood sample tubes, attached a heart monitor and some other tests, and the whole time he was communicating with and encouraging me 100%. If you're in Provo and you have an emergency - you want the EMT with the tattoo sleeves. You can bet there's going to be a huge thank you of some sort headed his way.

Sam screamed through this whole ordeal, and was so, sooo tired from the exertion of the seizure. I was so happy to hear him legitimately crying and not the awful half-sobs during that longest seven minutes of my life to date. We got to the hospital and there was a lot more poking and prodding and crying before they got him all settled in, but everything was looking AOK. Again, we were blessed with the creme de la creme of UVRMC. Our doctor, Dr. Swanson, was sweet and optimistic and totally didn't even acknowledge that I was showing some seriously inappropriate cleavage. We had two nurses and an ER tech, Nancy, Kelly & Kevin, who checked on us regularly and kept Sam - and us - comfortable and hydrated. If this had to happen, I am SO happy that it happened in Provo and not at home, where the hospital staff (not just in my experience) is way less than savory.

Four hours, a few x-rays and scans, another IV poke (the first one kind of closed off), and lots of annoying prodding and general not-leaving-me-aloneness later, Sam was totally cleared with a clean bill of health. Dr. Swanson explained that every kid is different, but some kids just hit a certain temperature and their little bodies start seizing as a natural attempt to bring the fever down. Apparently Sam has a really low threshold for that, and we will need to be really careful in the future to keep his fevers in check and 100% monitored in case this happens again. They gave him a prescription for Tamiflu, more as a precaution than anything, I think, because he had not shown any signs of being sick - besides a low-grade, what I thought was a teething fever the night before. It makes him sick and cranky, but I'm not taking my chances discontinuing it.

Once we were in the clear and just awaiting the return of a urinalysis (funny story about that - they gave him two bags of fluid to rehydrate him and try to get a urine sample without any luck. Nurse Kelly finally said "I'm just going to have to put a catheter in, poor guy!" and went to go get a catheter kit as Paul visibly flinched. He leaned over and said "come on, dude! they're going to do something horrible if you don't pee! PEE!" Sure enough, when she came back a minute later - full bag of pee! Again...smart kid, when it comes to to the violation of his pelvic area. :) ), I took a few pictures of our little guy.

Here he is after the initial round of prodding, when he was finally allowed to take the oxygen mask off and get some sleep. His fever had broken when he stopped seizing and it was actually pretty cool in the ER, so we brought out his favorite blankie. We spent a lot of time here just looking at him and realizing how perfect and precious our little boy is, and how much we love and adore him, even if he is a little gremlin half the time.

They brought in a plethora of snacks for him as we waited for that last test result. He was stoked about the cookies, of course. They had to put a little splint around his second IV site because the little booger was fighting it hard core and they didn't want him to pull it out again. He was immensely annoyed by not being able to use this hand, and kept trying to rip the tape off with his teeth like he was Rambo or something.

And of course, his ever-present juice cup. We forgot one at home and got this one as a souvenier, which we took because hey, it probably cost us like $40 or something like that.

Sam's been fine since the incident, and we got to take him home that afternoon and snuggle him in between us for a long, looong nap. He's been super fragile and clingy for the last few days, and hasn't been feeling well (again, I think from the Tamiflu), but all in all is getting back to normal.

I am so, SO grateful for the many people who were put in our path during this ordeal that were exactly what we needed - my parents, the EMT, nurses, doctor, and even the radiology tech who took the time to bring Sam a sticker to his room because she'd forgotten it in the radiology lab. I am incredibly thankful that, unlike me, my husband can keep a clear head in a crisis, even when it's his own son and he's terrified (he told me he had to just keep telling himself "I can't help him if I freak out. I can't help him if I freak out." Maybe I should try that next time?). Most of all, I'm thankful for the priesthood and the fact that Paul is a worthy priesthood holder who, when an emergency came up, could without question lay his hands on our ailing son's head and bless him that he would pull out of the seizure and everything would be okay. I knew from the second I heard that that he was going to be just fine at the end of the day - but it was still freaking terrifying. Thanks again to all the concerned friends, neighbors & family for all the prayers and checking-up on us.

love, mary